说乎？不说乎？
罪犯进教堂向神父忏悔。
从职业道德来说，不论忏悔的内容是什么，也不论犯下的过错多么罪恶，神父可以也应该劝导，可是不应该泄漏忏悔的内容，更遑论举报。
无关信任，而是从更宏观的角度来看，一旦泄漏或举报任何罪犯，则从此罪犯不再会向神父忏悔。结果罪犯既不会减少，反而导致罪犯从此缺乏宣泄罪恶的管道并获得开导的机会，在极端的心理因素下反而更可能使他们犯下更大的罪行。
可是，如果罪犯向神父忏悔之后，他的罪行正在持续伤害着他人，而神父对他的劝解又丝毫不起任何作用，神父应该怎么办？（严格来说，他只是寻找一个坦白的管道来减轻罪恶感，并不是忏悔）
说出去，有违职业道德；不说出去，对不起正在被伤害的人，不论伤害有多深。
我正在经历这道智慧的考验。有看法的朋友请上来回应。尤其欢迎基督教的朋友。
December 18th, 2006 at 11:51 am
Hi, I’m a protestant (methodist). I believe Jesus saves those who sincerely repent but will not accept those who purposefully take advantage from the meaning of Savior. If I’m you, I would consider 3 aspects: what kind of hurt (physical abuse? mental abuse? breaking laws?); What’s the motive of the sinner (feeling guilty? trying to get rid of responsibility?); What do you mean by telling others? (telling the victim or another friend?)
Of course, without doubt, if he committed physical abuse, he’ll end up in jail. But if he’s using someone mentally or victimizing someone innocent with or without plausible reason, I’ll be careful because he could have used me by telling me “stories” as if I’m just the rubbish bin, keep pouring his shitty untrue feelings to me. In such instance, not saying I don’t help, I admit I fail to help. What he thinks is very important here, he’s the 1 I wanna guide, perhaps leads or offer moral support. Next, I think it should be alright to tell someone (pastor? counselor? trusted ones?) when the case is overwhelming your emotion (e.g. you’re afraid of him around, he threatens you, he searches for you whenever he wants)& especially you feel you’re exhausted (e.g. not knowing what to do, been confused by his thinking, accumulated stress) because you WANT to help BUT not sure whether you REALLY do help him.
Significantly, regardless of how much hurt he does or how he despises you because he thinks “unethically” you’ve set a trap for him by telling his merciless behaviors, there’s ALWAYS a boundary between to tell or not. Trust your feeling! Such as when he causes discomfort & when he’s the 1 stepping over the boundary, we’re not God, so I rather get help. Again, seriously, this’s always the case when licensed psychologists face suicidal reports.
OK. I’ve been in such situation before. Although my friend named A insisted that I should keep her secret, I sought professional help as a resort since she’s hurting herself, putting herself into frustration & making her life a disaster. Finally, successfully, she got aided & became normal like us.
Actually I believe after I converse with “sinner” as you decribed, understanding what makes up his mind, what causes him to do stg, how he feels (coz i’m studying psychology), I’m confident that any serious criminal can be rescued adopting effective & practical methods, unless… he’s a serial killer, seriously. I’ve learned so much as I’ve “special ppl” around me. Usually they tend to be resistant at the 1st place, not acknowledging that their action is damaging & unhealthy, but with empathy & trusting relationships they can see the light of change towards a positive path. I personally never give up any disturbed ppl because “A merry heart does good, like medicine.”.
Isn’t christianity emphasizing the power of love? This’s the very essential quality for why we exist because God loves us - the sinners.
Carl Rogers, the founder of Existential therapy, embedded unconditional love, much like values hold by christians, to treat people as he never believes there’s “abnormality”, only there’re “lost ppl”.
Sorry. Been long-winded.
(~.^)Nitez…